How to be your dog's favourite person

Nick Jones sitting beside a labradoodle
Nick Jones
Dog Behaviourist and Dog Expert Witness
dog kissing owners face
Do dogs have a favourite person? Here’s everything you need to know about whether dogs have ‘people preferences’ and what to do if favouritism gets out of hand.

Quick Links

If you’re a dog owner, you’ve probably noticed if your dog has a favourite person. Sometimes, this might be you – but perhaps your dog saves their biggest tail wags for someone else.

Just like us, dogs can form strong bonds with certain people. Understanding how these bonds are formed can help you build trust and connection with your dog.

Some dogs seem to love everyone equally, while others clearly prefer one specific person. Other dogs might switch between a few different people, depending on who’s walking, feeding or spending most time with them.

All dogs form attachments with people, but the strength and style of the bond can vary. Research shows that herding and gundog breeds such as Boder Colliers and Labrador Retrievers tend to be people-focused, as are toy breeds like Yorkshire Terriers and Chihuahuas. Other breeds, like Shiba Inus and Akitas, still form strong bonds but can be more independent.

But a dog’s breed is only one part of the puzzle. Socialisation, training, day-to-day interactions and shared experiences are what truly shape a dog’s attachment.

Dogs often choose a favourite person based on a few factors, including:

  • Their primary caregiver. Dogs often gravitate towards the person who cares for them the most, particularly up until they’re six months old.
  • Their personality and breed tendencies. Some dogs prefer one specific person, while others enjoy spending time with different people equally.
  • Attention and affection. Regular play sessions, time spent together and positive experiences all help deepen the connection with your dog.

Because dogs form flexible bonds with people, their favourite person can shift over time. If their primary caregiver changes, or they spend more time with someone else, their attachment might reflect this.

If you’re the one feeding, walking and training your dog, it’s likely you’re already their favourite person. But beyond being the primary carer, there are a few signs to watch out for:

  • Your dog follows you
  • They get extra excited when they see you
  • They make frequent eye contact with a soft, relaxed expression

Instead of focusing on how to become a dog’s favourite person, observe how everyone in your house behaves and their day-to-day interactions with your dog. Try to balance the affection and quality time your dog gets equally between everyone. Below are some tips to get you started.

When a ‘less popular’ person takes on more caring responsibilities – for example, feeding and walking – it helps them integrate more deeply into your dog’s world. Usually, this means your dog starts to see them in a more positive light.

Consistency is key when setting boundaries for your dog. If they’ve grown attached to a family member who spoils them with unhealthy treats, now’s the time to break that habit.

Shared walks, gentle grooming sessions and fun new adventures can help your dog feel comfortable with all members of the family.

Sometimes, favouritism can start to cause issues – from separation anxiety and clingy behaviour to guarding one person from others or ignoring cues from the rest of the household. Use these tips to shift the balance and encourage your dog to build connections with others.

Assertiveness can help rebalance favouritism. Your voice and tone can play a big part in sending a clear message to your dog. This doesn’t mean shouting at them – try saying ‘on your bed’ or ‘lie down’ in a clear, firm tone that lets your dog know it’s a command, not a question.

When playing with your dog or teaching them new tricks, try using a softer, more excited tone. Considering how you use your voice around your dog might sound odd, but it can profoundly change your relationship for the better.

If your dog becomes so possessive of one family member that they show signs of defensiveness or aggressiveness towards anyone competing for that person’s attention, it can cause problems.

This kind of resource guarding behaviour can happen with any type of dog breed, with some dogs becoming so attached that they’ll shadow one family member, wriggling their way in between them and anyone else.

Allowing a dog to get to this stage isn’t healthy. Try gradually encouraging your dog to spend time with other members of the family and reward calm interactions. Make sure everyone helps with daily care, so your dog learns good things come from everyone, not just one person.

A deep-rooted version of favouritism can happen if you’ve welcomed a rescue dog into your home. The stress that some rescue dogs have experienced can surface as mistrust, fear, aggression or a reluctance to engage.

The triggers for rescue dogs can be wide-ranging and aren’t always obvious. Long hair, glasses or a particular tone of voice may increase their stress levels and affect their reactions. Nervous rescue dogs often form a strong attachment to one person in the house. In extreme cases, they may suffer separation anxiety if that person isn’t home.

Trying to push a new dog into liking you is likely to backfire, so the best approach is to give rescue dogs plenty of space to bond with everyone else in their own time. These tips can also help build a bond with your new rescue dog:

  • Most dogs are very food-motivated. Try gently tossing a treat, then stepping back, so they feel safe enough to come forward and take it.
  • Let them watch you place a chew or toy in their bed or crate, so they start to link you with things they enjoy.
  • Play a gentle game to build trust and encourage bonding.

Soft eye contact can help strengthen the bond between you and your dog. But for some rescue dogs, that can feel too intense. Instead, focus on giving them a stroke, without eye contact. Be patient, and eventually they should engage.

If you need extra support, qualified animal behaviourists can provide tailored advice. If you have dog insurance with Petplan, you can use our Pet Expert Chat feature to connect with experts, 24/7. Simply log in to your My Petplan account to get started. 

Found this article useful? Want to see similar content and engage with like-minded dog owners? Follow us on Petplan’s Facebook page.
 Nick Jones sitting beside a labradoodle
Petplan Behaviourist Expert

When it comes to pet behaviour, you'll go far to find anyone more qualified than Nick Jones. Nick has been a dog behaviourist for over 20 years, he has a Masters in Canine Behaviour and Training and is a full member of the Canine and Feline Behaviour Association. He also supports UK legal cases as a Dog Expert Witness.

Puppy training, dog recall, seperation anxiety, settling a new kitten - these are just a few of the topics that Nick has accurately co-written for you.

Find out more about Nick

Follow us

Petplan is a trading name of Pet Plan Limited (Registered in England No. 1282939) and Allianz Insurance plc (Registered in England No. 84638), Registered office: 57 Ladymead, Guildford, Surrey GU1 1DB.

Pet Plan Limited is authorised and regulated by the Financial Conduct Authority. Financial Services Register No. 311969. Allianz Insurance plc is authorised by the Prudential Regulation Authority and regulated by the Financial Conduct Authority and the Prudential Regulation Authority. Financial Services Register No. 121849. Pet Plan Limited is a subsidiary of Allianz Insurance plc.